No success in secession

In Opinion
Illustration by Alvan Ung / Daily Titan

Well, it’s happened. Thousands of United States citizens are petitioning to secede from the nation.

“Let’s be honest, red states want to secede because the white guy didn’t win,” reported Rmuse from liberal news site It feels like an awkward and undoubtedly drastic tantrum from the right side. Petitions have even surpassed the necessary 25,000 signatures to be placed in a queue for review and a response from the administration. These petitions include advocacy from Louisiana, Georgia and Texas.

What are the chances that the states would receive approval to secede anyway, right?

Up to 30 states have petitioners angrily signing their names away at We The People, the White House’s website for petitions. We The People was created by the Obama administration “to give all Americans a way to engage the government on issues that matter to them,” as stated on the homepage of We The People.

Oh the irony; Obama is offering a voice to the people and they use it against him.

Still, it’s a universal truth that whenever someone is given an opportunity to voice his or her opinion online, that opportunity will often be taken advantage of. YouTube comments are the prime example of this phenomenon. If the petitioners are just cyber bullying the rightful president of our country, there is always the good news that even the trolls are being trolled.

“In addition, there’s a petition in support of deporting anyone who signs a petition to secede from the Union,” reported the Standard Examiner. “And someone, perhaps from one of Texas’ more liberal cities, has posted a petition seeking signatures for Austin to withdraw from the Lone Star State but remain part of the United States.”

It’s good to see people are exercising their rights.

Many states have followed the outline and pattern of Louisiana’s petition that reads as follows: “We petition the Obama administration to: Peacefully grant the State of Louisiana to withdraw from the United States of America and create its own new government.”

It is written in the Declaration of Independence and has been quoted in the petitions, “Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, that whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it and to institute new Government”.

These rights that the Declaration of Independence are referring to are the rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. In short, these angry petitioners can sign away, but their rights haven’t been obstructed. These people are just angry because Mitt Romney lost to Obama. Still, Romney lost fair and square by both popular and electoral vote.

Obama hasn’t done anything to keep these citizens from life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

It’s debatable on the obstruction of their pursuit of happiness, but is the election of Romney really the sole product of happiness? If the petitioners are really using the Declaration of Independence as a source, they need to understand the meaning of these written words.

President Obama has not even had the chance to be destructive in the first several days of his second term.

Speaking of destruction, the secessionists would best take a look at their own state budgets before hastily signing a petition to break away from the nation to form their own little government.

“The states that have received the most signatures on petitions to secede from the union were also some of the largest recipients of federal funding in 2010,” ABC News reported.

How well would these states really do on their own without proper funding?

Now, I’ve always been one for the post-apocalyptic style of governments—they always make for an interesting storyline in shows and films—but that’s for entertainment purposes only.

With jokes aside, it has also been reported by ABC News that “six of the seven states that received more that 25,000 signatures on petitions to cut ties with the federal government received more that $10 million from the federal government that year.”

These seven states include Alabama, Florida, Georgia, Louisiana, North Carolina, Tennessee and Texas. These states combined took more than 23 percent of all federal revenue in 2010.

If Texas was to succeed in their cause, I have a feeling that the state would revert to the old Wild West days. On second thought, perhaps the union should let Texas be its own nation; after all, Hollywood definitely needs more material to work on to create original movies. I have a feeling this would turn out to be a knee-slapping comedy starring Will Ferrell.

The thought’s pretty humorous, actually.

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  • honnney

    It has always been my knowledge that while the u.s. government is under blind oblivion that any state requires the federal governments permission to peacefully seceed from the union, that the states however need only to actually submit a letter of signed intent to peacefully seceed containing 200 signatures with their new governments name such as i.e. The new federal united nationals of ___________. (Insert name of new country in the blank), seek the peaceful allied support of the united nations, which of course the majority of foreign governments would be more than gratefully happy to assist these struggling new nation with, especially since the majority of these 300 or so countries would love to see the decline of the united states anyway,(they just don’t tell the u.s. government that) and give them a specified date and time by which these brand new countries plan on being new nations along with copies of documents signed by your foreign governmental allies from other nations supporting the different american states secessions from the united states government,so that obamacare will not think that you do not have any support from foreign allies. So instead of waiting for daddy bamas permission to leave home just go ahead and take the bull by the horns and seceed anyway.

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